Dear future girlfriend,
Please understand that I may not like going shopping with you, talking about celebrity gossip or watching the housewives show but I do it because I love you.
That being said I must ask you for a simple favor. From the months of August (let’s argue and call it September) till January, every Saturday (for the most part) my college team (whom I have loved since I was a little boy) will play on national TV. I will put on my jersey and start my rituals. Now while I don’t have to watch every game and I have no problem skipping a game to do whatever it is you want to do I just want you to know that these few Saturdays a year mean a lot to me.
What I would really love is if you just sat down with me (for the 2+ hours) and watched those games with me. I will buy you a shirt so we can support the team together. After that we can do whatever it is you want. Win or lose.
*bonus: if my team wins in dramatic fashion we will have amazing sex.
*downside: if we suffer a humiliating or down to the wire defeat I may seem defeated. I will need your love and support.
Umm, all of this. The ex had never dated a college football fan before. It was a bit of a culture shock.
It also didn’t help that SEC means something completely different to her than it does to me.
Dear asshole that thinks I will ever be your girlfriend I fucking watch sports and I love the NFL (GO BEARS). I don’t give a shit about celebrity gossip and I don’t watch the Real Housewives. I do enjoy shopping but its also MY JOB. So if you want to stereotype me then maybe you should go find that airhead that doesn’t understand why you love the game. Because those of us that do don’t really want to date you.
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